Hi my loves, today I am 28 years old and recently I have been reflecting upon a few things I have learnt this year. Now to be completely honest I am not entirely sure if its either learning or admitting to some home truths I should have acknowledged a while back, regardless, here goes…
NO-ONE ELSE CAN DO IT FOR ME
At this point, no-one is going to be handing me any silver platters with a perfect life upon them which actually I am happy about. I have to really want it, I have to work hard for it and make it happen myself for myself. This means if I’m not going after it its probably not worth it to me or I didn’t really want it as much as I may have thought initially which is fine also. When you do work really hard on something, that moment when it starts to pay off or all come together it brings a wonderfully fulfilling feeling of accomplishment. Sometimes this hard work means you have a little less time for coffee catch ups with your girlfriends, or a little less money to spend on lavish dinners out and about, but I know (for me at least) my girlfriends understand and its all more than worth it in the end.
SOME FRIENDSHIPS HAVE AN EXPIRY DATE
Yes, a good one is definitely worth fighting for, but, if it gets to the point where your whole friendship is spent justifying yourself or arguing and apologising simply for being you, your friendship has probably expired and at some point its ok to let it go in order to allow yourself to place that energy into more positive people and activities. I read somewhere recently that we become the average of the five people we spend the most time with, with that in mind this year I have been shifting to focus on surrounding myself with and giving my energy to the people that bring positivity to my world and hopefully I have been giving it back to them in spades. Finding girlfriends that support your success and are genuinely happy for you and some which may even wish to help you push forward is very rare, but not impossible! Recognise, acknowledge and nurture your friends.
THE JOY OF ACTUAL WORK-LIFE BALANCE
For now I am focussing on climbing the life ladder over a corporate one, and am perfectly content with my decision to do so. I am by no means in a high powered job and that is fine with me as I actually love my job. I enjoy going to work each day, I like the company I work for, I think my colleagues are wonderfully driven people, most of which are hilarious and I love that at 5.10pm I can switch off my computer, switch off from work mode and switch on to thinking about other things like my blog, my next handbag conquest, another adventure or even just whatever Hamish and Andy are talking about on the way home!
I read somewhere recently that we become the average of the five people we spend the most time with..
MY BODY IS MEANT TO BE A WORK IN PROGRESS
I am curvy, there is no hiding it, I lent down in this dress and one of my curviest curves tried to pop out for goodness sakes, like it or lump it, I have a large chest and curvy hips and thighs. I am forever saying oh I will need to be skinny before I do that, go there, wear that. I am 28 years old and I have an hourglass figure and it ain’t going anywhere and thats it. Every time I flick through Instagram I see these girls, influencers, fitness models, bikini models and I day dream about how much easier my life would be if I woke up with a figure like that. There are a couple of things for me to address here.
First and foremost, Love thyself.
Secondly, remember for every aspect of yourself you wish you could change there are a dozen girls that would be over the moon to have a feature just like yours. I once had a girl ask to take a photo of my breasts as she wanted to have hers remodelled based on mine – at the time I thought it was the craziest thing I’d ever heard (though I will admit, I obliged her, she had them done and they looked great hahaha). My point is the grass is always greener, there will always be someone prettier, thinner, richer, smarter, more successful than you, accept that and cherish your best qualities they are the envy of someone trust me.
Thirdly, refer to paragraph one, no-one can do it for you!
My curves have actually played a big part in shaping (pardon the pun) the person I am today and this year I have learned a more healthy approach to maintaining them, no more yoyo diets or weeks of binge eating, I have worked out that consistently good habits put me in better shape both mentally and physically. I have been going for 5km runs in my lunch break each day and it is the best use of a lunch break I could think of, it clears my head and relaxes me while doing something really positive for my health. That to me is a definite Win-Win. So I shall keep running, keep squatting and yes even do the occasional push-up but I will also be enjoying a sweet treat along the way as they bring me such joy.
MY FASHION PERSONA
I am repetitive – that is ok
I am indecisive – that is ok
I am obsessive – that, well I am trying to curb it, but its ok.
This year I have been focused on finding and shopping based on my style. It is so easy to get confused in a crowded market of so many beautiful styles and it can be hard to know especially when you are younger what will work for you for the long haul. I like expensive things (sorry Matt) I can’t help it I just do. I actually recently tried to shop from a cheapie online shop called Storets, their stuff looks great in all the pics online and their styles are so now and the prices are very reasonable, but on my bust it was an ill fitting disaster. Annnyway, the thing with buying expensive fashion is if you don’t get the mileage out of it its a lot of money wasted. So this year for me has been about noting and investing in those shapes and styles that I wear time and time again. With that said Fashion and Style is an expression of who you are. I often dress for my mood so having a few special statement pieces in my armoury helps me to express my moment and feel wonderful when I wish to.
LIFE ISN’T GOING TO MATCH THE TIMELINE I DREW UP AGED 10
I am in Love. I am content with exactly where we are and the path that we are on together. Whether it matches the timeline I dreamt up when I was 10 years old or not (of course it doesn’t). I have found my happily ever after and we are on that journey together, we are a unit and we are on our journey not anyone else’s.
Nobody can tell you where you should be up to in your relationship, only you know that, communicate with each other, you should never ever be afraid to talk to your partner as it is the key to getting through life’s ups and downs. Listen to one another and be there for each other always.
Finally and most importantly
ITS ABOUT THE JOURNEY
I am a control freak and I know that. Often in the past, in my haste to make sure everything is ‘under control’ and ‘on schedule’ I have forgotten to stop and smell the flowers.
As a 28 year old I will make time to simply sit on a bench to watch a butterflies erratic flight, smell the flowers and gaze at the sunset. I am going to make time for life’s magic.
Dress: Self Portrait from Matches Fashion
Hat: Straw Boater from Lack Of Color
Sandals: Saint Laurent Tribute in Patent Nude from Barneys